Yesterday, my youngest child, my son, graduated from high school. This is a letter I wrote him to mark the occasion:
Dear CJ,
On your graduation day, it would
be good to look back on all of the adventures we’ve had over the past 18 years
of your life. We could reflect on all
the funny stories and great memories—the fun times, the goofy stuff. But I want to take this time to be serious
and remind you of something that you hated about school. I want to remind you of the tests. I know—on graduation day, the last thing
anybody wants to think about is tests. But since your diploma is still in our
hands and not yours, we’re going to talk about what I want to talk about.
In your 18 years on earth, you’ve
experienced some tests. One of the blessings of homeschooling is that your
whole life doesn’t revolve around a test schedule—except the dreaded annual
testing. It was different before we
started homeschooling, and it certainly has been different with all the classes
you have been taking at Bluefield College.
Tests are tough. They require
preparation. They require mental
toughness. They require being able to
adapt to the teacher’s idiosyncrasies and style. They require you to see and communicate the
material as the teacher sees it, not necessarily how you see it.
But school tests aren’t the only
tests you’ve experienced. You have been blessed to be raised in a Christian
home and we have worked hard to protect you from many of life’s tests until you
were ready to handle them. But you’ve
still had some. It took you 10 days in
neonatal intensive care to pass your first test. Later, you were tested with moving from state
to state, having to leave friends behind and make new ones—that’s a test. A dad being away from home far too much when
you were little—that’s a test. Extended
family issues, dealing with the loss of loved ones—those are tests. Transitioning from being a military brat to a
PK—that’s a test. Those tests have been
tough. We tried to prepare you for them
and shepherd you through them. They
developed a mental toughness in you.
They required you to learn to adapt to different styles and
situations. They allowed you to see and
communicate with people through their eyes, and not just your own.
The thing about tests is, there
is great satisfaction when you do well—and you have done very well. My pride wells up as I think about how well
you’ve done. But then there are the
times when failure comes. You are a good
student and haven’t experienced much failure.
Through God’s grace and protection, you haven’t experienced much failure
in life either. But it will come. And how you handle those failures is what
will determine the kind of man you become.
You’ve heard me say before—a man’s character is shaped and displayed
more in failure than in success. James
puts it like this: “Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of
various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces
steadfastness.”
My prayer for you on your
graduation day is that you will be steadfast and immovable—that you will endure
in your faith, in your strength, in your manhood. I would love to pray that tests and trials would
not come your way—but I won’t. As much
as it will hurt your mother and me to see you go through trials and tests, we
will pray that you continue to learn endurance and steadfastness through them,
so that you will never be shaken. So my
words to you on this important day are the same words that were given to me by
my Papaw Drake. They are the words King
David spoke to his son Solomon in 1 Kings 2:2-3: “Be strong, and show yourself
a man, and keep the charge of the Lord your God, walking in his ways and
keeping his statutes, his commandments, his rules, and his testimonies, as it
is written in the Law of Moses, that you may prosper in all that you do and
wherever you turn.”
Son, you are growing into a man
of faith, character and strength. I am very
proud of you now. But more than that, I’m
proud of who the Lord is making you to be.
May the Lord give you just enough tests in life that you will be able to
be strong and show yourself a man.
Love, Dad and Mom
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