The Seven Day Challenge

As a pastor, there are several challenges I can think to issue to our church. As a matter of fact, I have issued a few. Each year I issue a challenge for the congregation to read the Bible through in a year. Last year I challenged us to memorize one key passage each week. We (notice I said "we") didn't do too well on that one so we'll try again this year.

Recently, I heard about a pastoral challenge that I must confess I've never considered. Pastor Ed Young, Jr. of Fellowship Church has gotten a lot of attention with the challenge he issued his church a couple of weeks ago. As he stood before his 20,000 member congregation, Pastor Ed challenged the married couples in the church to commit to seven days of sex. And all God's children said....

Seriously....

Is this what it has come down to? Is this what the act of preaching has been reduced to?

Don't get me wrong—I’m not a poor caricature of a raging puritanical fundamentalist. The Bible is clear in its teaching that the marriage bed is to be pure and undefiled and is a gloriously intimate gift from God. (If you don't believe me, read the Song of Solomon by candlelight to your wife—now THAT'S a gift!)

My concern is not with God’s gift of the marital act. My concern is with God’s gift of the preaching act. How does this seven day challenge speak to hearts of the people’s sin? How does it speak to them of a righteous and holy God? How does it speak to them of their need for, and God's provision of, a Savior? Frankly, after seeing more Cialis and Viagra commercials than any human being should have to endure, I don’t think our society suffers from a lack of emphasis on sex. The problem with our marriages is not a lack of sex. The problem with our marriages is a lack of grace. We don’t understand the glorious Gospel of Jesus Christ and how He has designed marriage to portray that Gospel. If anything, that should be the challenge issued from the pulpit.

So here it is—Men, for the next seven days, I challenge us to love our wives as Christ loved the church (Ephesians 5:25-29). That means you need to be willing to empty yourself of everything you are for her. No pride, no position, no ego. In short, no self. To the point that even if she were to take advantage of you and abuse you and berate you—you will be silent as a lamb led to the slaughter. For the next seven days I challenge you to show your wife your love for her by being willing to sacrifice everything you have and everything you are for her—even to the point you will be willing to die for her (Philippians 2:5-8).

Men, if I'm going to issue a challenge to us, I must offer one to our wives as well. So, ladies, for the next seven days I challenge you to graciously submit to the headship of your husband (Ephesians 5:22-24). Erase from your mind all of the mitigating and self-exalting definitions of submission you've heard in the past. I’m talking real, unvarnished submission. The kind of submission that willingly and joyfully places your wants, needs and desires in his hands. The kind of submission that sees his plans as your plans and faithfully works to support and execute them—no matter the personal cost, no matter the personal sacrifice. All for the joy that is set before you (Hebrews 12:2).

That is the challenge I’m issuing. And if we as married couples respond to that challenge, we won’t have to worry about being challenged to physically enjoy our spouses. Physical intimacy will flow as passionately as it did between the Beloved and the Shulammite in the Song of Solomon.